Are Your WORDS Stealing Your Gains? (Part 2 of 3)

By Vince Del Monte, WBFF Pro Fitness Model, Certified Fitness Trainer and Nutritionist and author of No Nonsense Muscle Building.

I honestly believe that if you apply this advice, you’ll look back on your life in a few years and remember how it made a WORLD OF DIFFERENCE…

This is Part 2 of a three. Part 1 was called “Are Your THOUGHTS Stealing Your Gains?” which you can read here if you missed it. 

I don’t know about you but when I see a physique like this, the first thing I think is,“What are the big things this guy is doing that I’m not?” 

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And if you’re a lady you may say something similar to“What are the big things this girl is doing that I’m not?”

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And the key note I want you to percolate on is:

It’s often the small things that no one sees that result in the big things everyone wants!

Yesterday we talked about the power of our thoughts because our thoughts influence our words and our words influence our habits and our habits influence our LEGACY!

My dad give me this advice on my 13th birthday:

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Growing up, my parents taught me and my two younger brothers that although the tongue is a “small thing” it can accomplish “big things.”

The tongue has the power of LIFE and the power of DEATH.  

LIFE.

DEATH.

It’s that powerful!

Essentially, the words we speak to ourselves (and others) can be either LIFE-GIVING words or LIFE-TAKING words.

LIFE-GIVING.

LIFE-TAKING.

WOW.

Read that again:

The words we speak to ourselves (and others) can be either LIFE-GIVING or LIFE-TAKING! 

That’s how powerful that little tongue of yours is.

If you want to change the life you have, you need to change the words you speak.

There is the power of LIFE and DEATH in the words we speak to ourselves and others! 

Let’s make this practical now:

  • If you show me a marriage that is struggling I guarantee you’ll hear a lot of life-taking words…
  • If you show me a marriage that is thriving I guarantee you’ll hear an abundance of life-giving words…
  • If you see a situation where a boss and employee are fighting I guarantee you’ll hear a lot of life-taking words… 
  • If you see a situation where an employee loves his work and job I guarantee you’ll hear a stream of life-giving words… 
  • If you notice a personal training client is not getting results with their personal trainer, count on finding a lot of life-taking words…
  • If you notice a personal training client is crushing it in the gym with their personal trainer, count on finding an environment of life-giving words…

Another way timeless truth describes the power of WORDS…

Words have the power to HEAL your spirit or CRUSH your spirit.

Do the words you say to yourself and others HEAL your spirit or CRUSH your spirit?

Believe that words have the power of LIFE and the power of DEATH.

Here are some examples of life-taking words…

  • Did you mean to do that to your hair? 
  • Why are you not married at this point in your life? 
  • Do you even lift, bro? 
  • You’re pathetic… 
  • You’re going on a diet, again? 

While these may seem innocent, they are not. These words CRUSH people’s spirits. They pierce like a sword. There’s no doubt you’ve experienced life-taking words and they’re not something even the toughest of men can shrug off easily…

Here are some examples of life-giving words…

  • Man, I’m so proud of you… 
  • No one works as hard as you do… 
  • I would marry you all over again… 
  • That video you made was brilliant… 
  • Your abs look insane… 
  • I’m so thankful that we met and you’re in my life… 
  • You look amazing, you can tell you’ve been sticking to your plan…

Those words are HEALING to the soul, and as a newly married man I’ve really had to learn how to offer up more life-giving words…

And guess what? When there are more life-giving words there is also a lot more life giving… hehe  (use your imagination :))

(Hopefully Flavia is not reading this newsletter! LOL)

Yesterday we did a “Thought Audit” and today we’re going to do a “Word Audit,”and while we could talk about the words you speak to others, I want to specifically talk about the words you speak to yourself.

Be honest with yourself… do you speak life-giving words to yourself or life-taking words about yourself? If I had a private microphone hooked into your home, what would I hear?

  • I’m going to blow this…
  • I’m no good…
  • This is going to end really bad…
  • This is going to be a tough day
  • Anyone could replace me…
  • Oh my gosh, I’m so tired…
  • Things never work out for me…
  • I never get a break…
  • My life sucks…
  • I’m never going to make a difference…

Or would I hear…

  • There is someone bigger than me looking out for me…
  • I’m going to be blessed today…
  • I’m so thankful for this day…
  • I get to eat healthy today…
  • I’m going to crush my workouts…
  • My future is looking up… 
  • I have the strength to nail this…
  • My life matters and I’m going to help someone today…

If you want to change the life you have you must change the words you speak!

Again, your words have the power of life and your words have the power of death.

Now, time to give you some homework so you can EXPERIENCE the power of this…

You have three rules to remember:

Rule #1 — If you don’t have something good to say, SHUT THY TRAP! 

Simple! The good book tells us to not let ANY unwholesome talk come out of our mouths but to only say things that are helpful and BUILD OTHERS UP.

If that’s not practical advice, I don’t know what is. If you just apply this one rule to yourparenting, workplace, fitness, family and friendships, it’ll make a world of difference.

Rule #2 — If you don’t have something good to say, SHUT THY TRAP! 

SHUT THY TRAP also means ZIP IT, PUT A SOCK IN IT, SKIP IT. (Yes, it was intentional that I have this rule twice :))

Rule #3 — If you think of something good, give it life and SAY IT! 

This might feel weird to apply because you’re saying life-giving words about yourself, but you should try it. If it’s hard to do on yourself, start by doing it on other people.

When you think of something positive about someone, give those words LIFE by saying them. Don’t keep them inside. Your thoughts are not enough. SAY IT.

Go out of your way today to compliment three people for anything. Just do it. Use that little tongue of yours to GIVE LIFE today. And then start practicing on yourself.

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Growing up, my parents always encouraged me, supported me and loved me with WORDS. They told me. They didn’t just show me, they actually SAID IT. I heard the words loud and clear. And they repeated themselves daily!

I used to date a Polish girl, and even into her mid 20s she had never heard her father say, “I love you.” EVER. She used to say it was a Polish thing but it always showed up in certain areas of her life… Let’s just say she sought those words her father never gave her by dating A LOT of guys, and getting into fitness modeling where the camera said over and over that she mattered.

It’s a sad story and just a small example of how powerful WORDS are. Sometimes not saying anything is as bad as saying something wrong.

I was blessed to have parents who went to the extreme and constantly told me and my brothers:

  • “You’re the best looking boys in your school.”
  • “I love your big nose. It suits you perfectly.”  (LOL)
  • “You’re the most disciplined kids on the block.”
  • “You mean so much to us.”

OK, I’ll stop getting sappy but the funny thing is, I never wanted my parents to stop sharing those sappy words with me. Although I would say, “I know … I know… stop embarassing me…” I liked when they said them. They breathed life into me. They shaped me and made me who I am, and if you are a parent I encourage you to take every possible opportunity to offer LIFE-GIVING words to your kids. This is one thing you can NOT overdo.

If you want to change your world, change your words!

In application to yourself, say the words out loud.

Find a statement that gives you life and repeat it over and over. 

I am STRONG!

I am a WARRIOR!

I am a HARD WORKER!

Say it out loud. Give those thoughts life and your world will change.

Have a great day, and in two days we’ll wrap up with Part 3 — Your HABITS!

Vince

P.S. If you’re interested in being ripped for summer, watch this video to the very end and make sure you avoid these 3 scandalous “healthy eating tricks” sabotaging your nutrition and your workouts.

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