Do You Own Your Life?

By

Vince Del Monte, WBFF Pro Fitness Model, Certified Fitness Trainer
and Nutritionist and author of No Nonsense Muscle
Building.

While on the treadmill I was reading one of my favorite magazines, Men’s Fitness, and got inspired by the editor in chief’s intro this month.  It got me thinking too…

The term ownership can be misleading.

You own your car, right?  Not if you have 3 years worth of payments on it. Otherwise, the dealership really owns it.  You own your home, right? Not if you have a 10 year mortgage still left to pay.  The bank owns your house.  You own your business, right?  Maybe if you have no investors.  Otherwise, the check book guys who lent you the money own your business. If you look at your life, what do you really own?

Maybe you own your home, own your business and own your car which is absolutely impressive but you’re starting to discover that all the stuff you’ve accumulated doesn’t matter much and it’s going to go back in the box it came from when you’re gone. You’ve focused your ownership on the wrong things.

Wherever you’re at in life, I want to encourage you that ownership is worth fighting for. Ownership does matter specifically in one area: Your life.

I know I am only 29 years old but bare with me here – I am not going to share some insights I have gathered through my own experiences.

I am fully aware that owning your life is a wild concept.  I understand that you could get in a car accident that is out of your control.  I understand the diagnosis could come back positive. I understand that you could lose your job. I understand there are many circumstances beyond your sphere of control. I get it.

So with all these curve balls that could be thrown at any moment, how can you really own your life?

Easy to explain.  Not easy to do.

Begin by owning each area of your life that you can control: the time you go to bed and wake up, your attitude, the restaurants you visit, the intensity you workout at, the people you spend time with, what you do when you’re stressed, how you dress and carry yourself, the time you spend with loved ones, what supplements and groceries you buy.

Start initiating action in these elements of your life and you’ll be awakened at how much you actually own. You’ll be empowered how different pieces of the puzzle (of life) start to come together.  You’ll be empowered by the success and growth you begin to experience.  I recommend you become accountable in the areas of you life that you can take ownership.

Start owning the minutes in your day, own your friends, own your workouts, own your food, own your passions and don’t worry about the rest.

You can own more than you know.

Start now.

Vince

P.S. Now it’s your turn – tell me ONE area of your life that you are going to start owning.

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Comments

44 thoughts on “Do You Own Your Life?

  1. I owned my destiny, but gave control of it over to Jesus when I asked Him to become the Lord of my life. Life has a completely different outlook now and regardless of what comes, I have the God and Creator of the universe walking with me through all of my life. I can’t imagine living without Him now.

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  2. Hey Nick..you’re absolutely right. I should not apologize for that. There is an example of accountability live in action.

    Paul – Thanks for seeing that I like to give far more than I take. I have always strived to give 10x more than I take. If you ever see me not doing this – give me a virtual slap. Sounds like your clients are in good hands with you. Keep it up

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  3. Hi Vince,

    I’ve just started trainning for the New Zealand Masters next year for 100, 200 metre sprints. I’m doing cardio, weight lifting, eating the right foods and trying to get enough rest etc, but still feel tired. Maybe I’m doing something wrong, as I’m finding it difficult to lose the weight. can you advise me?

    Thanks Ro

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  4. You were READING A MAG while on a treadmill!!??? Shame on you!! Just kidding..hee hee hee. (but SOMEONE hadto say it)

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  5. Hey Vince,

    What I own? Wow! I don’t truly own a lot of material objects but there are a couple intangibles objects that I have mastered . It might not be a huge deal to the average person but to me it ranks pretty high. One is the able to change and heal my body through nutrition and training. I’ve had some (ok a lot) health problems over the past 10 years of my life and what I’ve found is if I eat clean real foods I have no problems! Truly set me free in many areas of my life Vince. The second is I own the the gym. I feel like an absolute beast for the hour and a half that I’m there. No one can stop me no matter how big they are. That’s what own, it sounds funny but its defiantly a rush!

    Thanks Vince

    Talk to you later!

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  6. yo dude!
    could you please tell me how to get ripped abs fast ?
    what im doin now isnt working . please help

    ja

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  7. I had wrote to you before how to built muscle and the write exercise.Please help me.

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  8. I totally agree with you Vince but agreeing with you is not good enough. I think its about time I started taking control of my life. My body has improved,thanks to you but i know its not to its 100% capability yet. This article really helped wake me up on what to do next. Thanks

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  9. I now own my health and fitness after transforming myself from the physical wreck that I was 2 years ago. I also own the early retirement I’m taking to the Philippines next year. Yaaay !

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  10. Nice article Vince, age has nothing to do with wisdom, 29 is as good as 80. May I add a few thoughts to it?
    You meant to say we, all of us, have one most precious thing, ourselves. Each one of us has the power and ability to a lesser or greater degree to be in command of our lives, exercise our freedoms to be, because we are, we exist. Our time is ours, our decisions are ours. To be in present time to enjoy the moment, or to drift into our own Universe away from the common realities that unite us with others. These things we really own, nobody can take them away from us. Being aware of these things gives us peace and a sense of power and control of ourselves.

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  11. Hey Vince!

    just wanted to drop u a short line.

    There are alot of fitness type guru’s on the net. I do Personal Training for Bally Total Fitness. I’ve been training for over 10+ years…..i just turned 5O!

    Thank you for the way you give yourself to your PASSION FITNESS…..and the way you motivate and inspire others! I have purchased some of your products….but i really like the way u give away alot of your content, ideas, workouts…..for Free……..i feel that that makes you even more believable and makes people want to listen and get involved with what you are all about…..and motivates/persuades them to purchase your products……rather then hard sell them!

    Keep on TAKING THE HIGH road…….and alerting us to the GOOD , BAD , AND UGLY of the fitness WORLD! YOU are TRULY an INSPIRATION TO ALL!!

    IN FITNESS,
    Paul Barrett
    paulbb62@yahoo.com
    New (South) Jersey……( the home of Sinatra, Bon JOvi, and Bruce! )

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  12. I have taken my life back by not taking any shortcuts in massage I am my own man i do what i do beacuse I have been doing what my family has wanted me to do no more I do need to take my workout and stay healthy life though.

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  13. Very interesting. Thank you. I will start to own for me the hottest commodity one can ever own – TIME.

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  14. Very Inspirational. I never really thought about what I actually own. Now that I think about it, I own a lot of my life (what I eat, how hard I train, my grades, etc.). I will try my best to own more of my life. Thanks for the inspiration Vince.

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  15. Great article. Even though you can own your life in so many different ways, you’ll never know what you’ve really done until you look back at it one day and just realize what could I have done to control my life better, and if you can’t answer then you know you’ve truly owned your life.

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  16. Hey Vince,

    Great Email.

    You said this, which I am a little confused about::> ***I know I am only 29 years old but bare with me here – I am not going to share some insights I have gathered through my own experiences***

    Why Not??? I don’t care that you are “only” 29. Share your own experiences, age is not an indicator of life experiences, I know 40 / 50 year old’s that don’t have as many experiences as you do because they have never broken out of the 9-5 job that they hate because they are afraid of failure so much (Hence their experience of life is that of an 18 year old over and over again). They never seem to have a problem sharing their life experiences (About how much they hate their jobs lol).

    You are a living legend because you have conquered fear and you live a life of freedom through choice, and for this reason I would like to hear your experiences for maximum learning experience.

    Look forward to your response,

    Nick Papaziakas

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  17. Karen – I hear ya sister. We were ALL bought at a price 🙂 I’m glad you’re living the truth 🙂

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  18. It’s amazing how fast you’re training schedules and tips work. My brother and I train together and we enjoy training a lot more than before. Less time in the gym, a lot more result!

    We have one question…..

    How do you take off your shirt after that bloody hard workout (of day one on youtube 🙂 )

    Regards,

    Jeroen en Sjors from the Netherlands

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  19. Vince,
    First I look forward to reading you e-mail’s everyday! As for owning my life, I was in debt to everyone a few years back. Lost my job, and it was the best thing that has ever happened to me! I became self employed traveled the country buying & selling products. In August of 2008 I made fitness a priority! I love owning my life! I might not always make as much money as I like but I owe nothing to anyone! Thanks Vince for the workout motivation.

    Josh

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  20. Vince,

    Thanks for the great article. The one part of my day I love to “own” is my mornings. Not having to get up at some preset time to go to someone else’s business to do someone else’s work. Freedom is owned by all of us, if we take that responsibility!

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  21. Dear Vince,

    Great article Vince! You are truly an “old” & wise 29-year old… great article! I learned something like that when I was in my 20’s… it is something I think you’ll like.

    It is a story of a university professor visiting a Tibetan Monastery in the Himalayas, I forgot where I read the article from it was many years ago but it goes something like this:

    After only 2 years in the Monastery, the University Professor finally lost his temper and said to his teacher… “I don’t get it, I think it’s all B.S. what you guys do here!… There’s nothing I can learn, and there’s nothing I can write about to teach to the western world.”

    Teacher: “Okay, if you really want to know what it is… here is your lesson Mr. University Professor…

    “when I eat, I eat!,
    when you eat, you don’t eat.
    When I walk, I walk.
    When you walk, you don’t walk.
    When I shower, I shower.
    When you shower, you don’t shower.
    That is the lesson that you need to learn here. That’s it.”

    University Prof: “Why did you make me wait 2 years to tell me that?”

    Teacher: “Because if i told you that on the first day, you would never have given it any weight.”

    Meaning of the lesson… when the Prof. is eating, his mind is wandering, when he is walking, he is somewhere else. When he is showering, he isn’t there either, etc.

    But this also leads to another story that is quite interesting. I met a girl at my best friend’s party several years back who is an avid follower of the Dalai Lama when he was visiting Los Angeles, she attended his “concert.” I see many people looking for answers from someone outside themselves…

    Just like your “Obama” is not going to fix your life article… this event really happened and the girl I met was shocked and upset that there was a western (American man) who asked this question:

    It was the last question the Dalai Lama (D.L.) was taking… the question was:

    “D.L. how can I get to enlightenment as fast as possible?”

    DL paused, cried, and the lashed out at him in anger! And said, “ you Americans, want fast food, fast cars, fast women, and fast enlightenment. It is impossible!”

    WHY D.L. was wrong… by crying (body’s reaction to mind’s unacceptance of now, D.L. is not accepting the now (he is not there and wishes this man didn’t ask that question), at the moment there is a man asking a question (a very good quesion), by lashing out, DL was in judgement, and we all know that judgement comes from ego’s high self better than other’s view point… not very enlightened himself Mr. D.L.

    Anyways, my little nephew can bring this dude asking the question to enlightenment as fast as lightning… by simply asking the man to play a game with him or possibly someone can slap him on the face and the pain allows him to focus on the now (the pain)… or if someone pulls a gun to you, you will know exactly the features of the person’s face and even go as far as count the number of hairs sticking out of his nose!

    Anyways, in short I played professional golf for 2 years and I learned from Tiger Woods how to stay in the state of “no mind” and it was imperative that I stay focused in the now and not let my mind make a sound as soon as I step onto the stage (the 1st tee)… “no mind” as in Bushido, “the zone” as per Sport’s Psych. You don’t’ have to stay in this state for the 5 hours of golf, you can look at the girls, chat about, joke around… but during the shot, you must empty the mind… just like in weight lifting during your sets.

    And as per your “6 Tricks to Unleash Muscle Growth” it is imperative too that we focus & have our “game-face” when we are exercising.

    Okay, I hope that wasn’t too long & boring… just something I wanted to share after I read your artcile…

    Thank you for reading.

    Hendrik :O)

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  22. hey vince , i really didnt pay attention to ownership of my life , i see things in a different way but never like that , your article has opened my mind to how i really see the concept of “owning my life” now iam going to start seeing what i really own and how i can change my life for the better

    Thanks Vince!

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  23. Hi Vince,

    What a nice subject!Very interesting.You have reached the point this time from a different angle.As you said all these are materialistic things which you will not take with you to the grave.What you own is your attitude,choosing your friends and the path of your life,and these are the things which you have control on while the remaining are out of your control.I am trying my best to do so and you can say starting of 2009 I had taken important decisions from deleting some bad influencing people from my life and introducing new ones,changing the way Iam acting with others,and finally changing totally what and when Iam having my meals.I will continue doing so and I will always look forward to the future.

    Thank you for the effort you always show for your customers and the support we all have from your side and wish you all the best.

    Saad Bitar
    Kuwait

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  24. I am retaking ownership of my motivation and determination. I had it before then lost it and now I will definitely get it back.

    On a side note, keep up the great work. I enjoy reading your messages/blogs. Very enlightening for such a young man:)

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  25. Sorry if this is an obvious query but can anyone tell me where the 6 week full body muscle gaining workout is??

    I am in need of a workout plan

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  26. Great article Vince!

    I actually shot a new set of DVDs the other day with a life couch and although I live by many of the things she mentioned during the shoot of these DVDs it was very refreshing to hear it all again in the same way as whne I read your article. The most important thing is to learn what you can control in life and what you cant. Once you find out what you can control and you start CONTROLING those things you can start changing your life as you spoke in this article.

    The great thing is that almost everything PERSONAL to you, like your body, what you eat, what you read etc YOU CAN CONTROL. That is why I love being in the fitness industry as you can change your body NOW. You don’t need to wait for your boss to give you promotion before you can start or make 10 years of payment before you can get six pack abs, NO, you can start today and the best thing is that once you start with your body, everything else, from your business to your personal life, as it did with me, will also fall in place and become better. The best part of all of this is YOU are in control and only YOU can decide if you want to change now or not!

    Thanks Vince!

    Peter Carvell

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  27. Very good thoughts Vince.I had 3 tears ago bone marrow transplant so I know what is the most important thing in my life.I do what I like -bodybuilding.

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  28. Very inspiring words Vince, thank you. I moved my home 12,000 miles to take control of my life. Mind you, I will bear with you, but not BARE with you! Keep them coming.

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  29. Hi Vince. That’s a really interesting thought about ownership…I had a big realisation last year about the same thing, though I thought of it in terms of ‘conserving’.
    What it meant was this: I realised I was thinking all the time in terms of succeeding and changing in a big way, but that life was actually made up of the little day to day things.
    So conserving, to me, meant things like being on time and expecting that of others. Doing just that bit more in the gym, in my work. resting more. Eating just that bit more fruit, drinking more water, being cleaner round the house. In terms of money, instead of only thinking about making huge amounts more, I realised that wealthy people became that way partly through small amounts. If I saved only £10 a week that would soon add up.
    And so on. It was a big change, cos things that had seemed small and boring, suddenly took on great significance. Like ownership, as you define it, it’s working with the things that you can have a real impact on, not just living in your dreams…(though dreams are important too).
    So thanks for reminding me of all this!

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  30. Hey Vincie…
    That was a real cool insight into some of the simplest stuff…..Inspired with it, I am gonna put those things straight into practice……
    Thank You bro…..
    you rock man!!!

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  31. Hi Vince – love your stuff – however I no longer own anything – no not even my body! But I am a steward of everything and most importantly a steward of what goes into this body, through my mouth, my eyes and my ears!
    Why – cos this body of mine must accomplish everything in my destiny for the One who I serve. There is a higher calling, much bigger than me and my stuff, which motivates me. I work for the King and He’s in the business of expansion – yes even in a recession – lol.
    So I’ll train this body – with your programmes cos they work – for Him.
    cheers

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  32. I’ve been really thinking lately…..I am very unhappy at work, I’ve had lots of drama in 2008 and after following Vince’s program, I have been inspired to continue doing it long term. I feel so good about myself and I feel that I am doing something for ME! I set the month of May as a deadline for me to move to Ca, I will most probably take a fitness course and become a Certified Personal Trainer and Nutritionist. Even though I have an MBA, but I am just so sick of the corporate world and sitting on my butt in front of a screen/meeting for over 8 hours just ain’t my thing anymore. I want to enjoy MY life…..so I decided to take this step and head into a totally different direction. Something I enjoy doing…

    Your email really inspired me Vince and re-assured me that I am doing the right thing for ME. Just like Crystal Waters said, “I left my job, my boss, my car and my home, I am leaving for a destination I still don’t know”!!! In my case, it’s Ca…..after my course, I don’t know and I am sooooooooooooo excited!

    Thank you Vince!

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  33. This topic was really amazing it inspired me to get my shit in order.I started to go to the gym 5 months ago because I had a brother that used to beat me and just being a negative person towards me.I always had low confidence.Since I started working out I feel better and more aware of myself,not the depressed zombie I used to be.Now I want to start gymming harder by using your programs.I have tasted the feeling of success and I want more.The more I can grow the better you will feel about everything.Thanks for all your work VInce.

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  34. Nice thoughts Vince…. It certainly makes sense and i am sure keeping these small things in your mind will help towards being a better person…..Not only physically but mentally as well :-))

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  35. Great post Vince, too many people float thru life thinking that they can’t control anything but the examples in your post are simple but powerful steps that people can take to take back control where it counts.Cheers from Down Under

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  36. Thank you so much Vince for awakening that spirit of ownership.i will make it my duty to own every aspect of my life that is important.Thank you.!!!

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  37. About home gym workout you can have workout abs bench dip bar hang i never stop using home gym i don’t never have time to go for gym but i usually do always wake up 12 midnight do y workout and daily home life i’m not lazy i’m active fews secs or mins tired i take rest i hate to skip workout and daily meal y shape is important i lost y weight close to 50kg i think about it.people who buy gym home workout don’t use are stupid lazy ass who doesn’t workout daily at the gym so it is same be active daily i have too much to do in life daily practising yself for y work (dancing video made with y boyfriend(singer) same like me active work hard move it)take much of a more time.your workout sending is perfect and i do sweat alot of doing 1 hr or half or almost 2 hrs.depend on y workout plus ur so nice i’m interested in your stuff i’m really happy .

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  38. Hey Steve! Thanks for the kind words. That email made my day. Keep rockin.

    FYI… if you’ve posted on my blog before, I DO, read 90% of the posts (some of them I skim) but can not respond to all of them or i would have carpel tunnel syndrome and a hunch back the rest of my life…ha! I apologize if you do not get a personal response from me. I’ll typically take the most common questions that I am unable to respond to and answer them in a future newsletter, video or product so you’ll eventually get your answer.

    Another FYI, most of your questions are already answered on my blog, articles, videos or one of my paid programs. You’ll have to do a little hunting but you’ll find your answer if I am unable to attend personally.

    I’m off to Washington D.C. till Sunday. talk soon
    vince

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  39. One more thing i wanted to say, if your unhappy with some area in your life, you have to work up the ‘minerals’ and just change it, really go with what your gut is telling you to do. Because there is nothing stopping anyone from doing anything(i know that sounds unrealistic, but within reason im talking about) It’s only your negative mind set thats stopping you. just go for it

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  40. I am always on the path of ownership because life and our situations are always changing, whether i realised it or not before i watched this video, like Delmonte said, Who you Hang around, where you work, how you eat, sleep, or however you choose to live your life. A few months ago when i watched his youtube videos and brought his program, the only other honest guy in fitness i really admired was Tom Venuto, because both these guys really put it too you straight because they have been there and done it. Since i brought his program i have started working out more, im about 3 pounds off visibly seeing my six pack and have developed more confidence that i even changed to a better job that previouse i was to afraid to take!

    I really Hope you will read this Vince, you have really inspired me to “own” my life back when i first started to read your program!! Your the Bomb Delmonte thanks again. I hope everyone that reads this stuff has a great positive change as i am having!! Sorry for the big Comment, but i think people should know

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  41. Thanks Vince for the inspiring remarks, yes I own much of my life I am 49 years old I have seven children there is a diference in Canada and in our small Island states, in the southern hemisphere. In our world 80% of land is customary owned that means own by people not government. I’ve been reading your mails and messages, trying to make the best of my body. I am slowly changing my way of eating, trying to live in a better life same as my children. Hope to hear from you soon.
    Regards,
    Malaeliua Sua

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  42. I own as much of my life as possible, what I eat, the supplements I take, when and how I workout, etc. Plus I take each day as it comes around.

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  43. Thanks for tips, i hope it can be useful at my life…

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